Notes on the Experience of Making Art, 2004

Jan 11 Sunday: A cold snap plus the decision to cancel the duck show at the end of this month gives me the freedom to play, think, write; try something different. Realized I've been working two full time jobs without a real break (except for a funeral, which isn't a break at all) for at least two years--ALL my vacation time from my day job has gone to the birds, and I've been charging 27 hours a week to the business, on average.; Rest. Sleep. Play.; New Year's Resolutions:; 1. Make more art. For now, this includes more playing. I want to paint my tired old vinyl floors something more interesting. (People who have dogs do not need white vinyl flooring.) Recover the couch, and for at least today, I'm thinking of painting the upholstery myself (hey, I talked myself out of knitting slipcovers...). Finish carving the box columns for the front porch and get them installed; work on the back porch. Finish the indoor projects before the weather gets pretty and I don't want to be indoors at all.; 2. Get published four times. Recognized that I AM a writer, on top of everything else, and I really need to take action on that. Keeping a blog on a website is nice but it's a limited readership. So get something written out there and let the universe of the written word decide what happens next. So far, I'm 2.5 toward the goal--sent an article to the UCCG newsletter; sent a story about Ridgway to several newsletters; editing a book about chainsaw carving that I hope to have ready by Ridgway 2004. I wish my co-carvers could spell...; (An amusing-to-me observation: At my day job, I am partly responsible for ensuring the accuracy of the estimates we make for software projects. Sometimes I think our processes are overkill. I was sitting with my raw files for this book--downloads of a year's postings on the Carving Post chatlist--wondering how long this project was going to take and was it realistic to expect to have a saleable product by the end of February. Started the spreadsheet--total size of the *.txt files, size of the *.doc files after clean up, page-to-*.txt ratio, minutes/page to clean files... Project forward across the entire set of files. 40 hours. Ouch--that's just for initial processing; not including reading and real editing at all. Account for initial set-up of the file cleaning macro--lots of learning time. Revise estimate based on new processing time. 22 hours. Better. Might get even faster as I go.; Currently looking at 600 pages which is too many. Will call around to get copying prices, too--that will affect my red pencil when I start reading. Need to add time for the index; that's the biggest selling feature, IMHO.; But: Artist or not, I can't get away from 14 years of day-job training. Keep that estimate spreadsheet and keep evaluating estimate-to-actual and see where I stand. If I do this in 2004, I'll start earlier, to be sure.); 3. Drop one, add two. One of the coaching newsletters I read offered a suggestion for improving your life: Each month, drop one thing you dislike and add two things you do like. By the end of the year, you'll be in a completely different situation. This struck me as a powerful suggestion, in part because I had already done this for January, albeit not according to this plan. I had a thought that I needed more time in my day, and one thing that took time was reading the WSJ every day. I feel a need to keep up with the world; I like some of the columnists; I hope one day to be the subject of one of their A-hed stories, and I love the crossword puzzle, but nevertheless the idea of that extra time struck me as desirable. So I put myself on the Friday subscription. To the best of my knowledge, the WSJ doesn't promote this, but their vacation stop website let me do it. May subscribe to the online version to keep up with the columnists and the editorial page. Drop one.; Add two: Knitting and movies.; See the last of the December 2003 blog for one entry about getting Law and Order DVDs as a Christmas gift, and another about knitting again after 4 years away from the needle(s). (It's just like I never left, which was also true about smoking after some time away... hum.); I haven't written in here about my total TV abstinence program. From 1969-now, I have watched less than 1 hour of TV a week, max, and that's probably a gross overstatement. I have watched TV when I visit my parents, and in hotel rooms on business trips, and that's it. Don't go to many movies, either. I've owned a VCR for about 4 years but I bought it to watch videos that accompanied a business class, and own 2x as many exercise tapes (that I don't use) and chainsaw carving videos (that I do watch), as movies. (22:11, for the record.); So now I own two years of Law and Order on DVD and I'm engrossed, but leery of a powerfully addictive medium, but I'm knitting during the shows and that's a good thing, and observant that the rhythm of my day is shifting and I'm sleeping more, which for me is a also a good thing. And eating less--rush to eat dinner so I can sit and knit and watch the show and knit, instead of lingering over dinner and a book and second or third helpings.; I had an inkling that perhaps loading my database with other people's stories and images in the form of movies and TV would be a good thing back in October, when I blew up a TV in a hotel room during a Law & Order: Criminal Intent episode. (People told me whodunit; waiting for the third year to come out on DVD to go back and see if I can determine what was so disturbing about the show that I couldn't let myself see the ending.) (See Feb 1 entry for more about this episode.) For today:; Not sure if movies can replace the impact of a TV series which develops characters over a much longer time frame.; Not sure how I can adjust my routine to accommodate movies, with their longer times, as opposed to the neat 43-minute units of a TV series.; No-one locally rents sets of TV-series DVDs.; My budget doesn't have a whole lot of room for buying sets, and even daily rentals at the Mini-Mart ($3/day, $1.50 on Wed) mean something else goes. For that matter, I'm not sure what the whole point of this exercise is. I'm attached to my role as book-maven, generally knowing which is the best book to read in any of a number of fields, and movie-viewing and book reading displace each other. Allowing that a year of movie viewing probably won't hurt much. It's a big void and it never hurts to be a little bit in touch with the culture.; My day-job manager told me about netflix.com, which rents an unlimited number of DVDs, three at a time, for $20. I can watch 9 movies at the Mini-Mart for $20 a month, but with that program I have to flip the movie in one day or I pay more. Netflix lets you keep the disk as long as you want but doesn't send any more than three until you return one. Looks promising. Spent 90 minutes on their site, entering reviews of the few movies I'd seen and selecting from their listings (which include a few TV series!). At least until we get to DST and I can carve on weekdays after my day job, it looks like an interesting experiment.; I woke up this morning wondering what I would drop and add in February, and then had to remind myself it was only the 11th of January and there were three more weeks for the next round of changes to present themselves.
Feb 1, 2004 Sunday: What a month! Knitting like a demon, finding the Knitting Goddess and Handpaint Country encouraging me to use even more color in my work. Writing a book about chainsaw carving that needs to be ready by the end of the month. Coming back to life after two month's artistic hibernation and gestation. Fixing up my house to support even more creativity. Ice storm and isolation. First possibly serious chainsaw injury, stopped by my chaps. $75 initial cost, 3 years, $howmanythousand for the avoided ER visit and follow up.; Duck show sold my space so I have my booth rental back. Whew. Very glad I'm not out of town this weekend and I can focus on other art.; All of that is a bit of a run-on. Maybe I should take it one at a time.; The knitting continues at a furious pace. Finishing the red sweater I started between Christmas and New Year's and setting up a mostly-blue one next. Hanging out in the yarn stores again. Expensive habit. Buying knitting books as eye-candy; loading the database for the next project after this one. Maybe try a new form of knitting for me? Patchwork catches my eye, with other people's fancy hand-dyed colors instead of my own intarsia blends. Not sure yet; haven't cast on the blue so there's plenty of time and I am able to stick to my resolution about not buying ahead of myself.; Found The Knitting Goddess courtesy of an amazon.com search on knitting books. Deborah Bergman majored in comparative religion; it shows. Links the ancient goddesses who had fiber anywhere in their story to our lives today; completely engrossed me. Off to my Bullfinch to find out more about these stories.; I frequently haul glossy magazines home to use as raw material for my color notebook and sculpture idea book. I've learned which ones are the richest source material (Architectural Digest, Veranda) and which to leave alone (Organic Style, most travel magazines, Gourmet). Found a new-to-me magazine: Dwell in the glossy recycle yesterday. Brought it home. Nothing of interest for my own art. Noticed a paragraph of editorial content about My Architect, a film about the life of Louis Kahn. Left three families when he died; the movie is his son's search for understanding about Louis' life. This is the story featured in the Law and Order episode over which I blew up a TV. Website for the movie links to an interview with Nathaniel Kahn who talks about creativity in architecture and film; rich material. Hope the movie comes to Raleigh or they release the story on DVD. This may be one I have to own and watch a few times. Hungry for more information, any information, about how other artists have experienced their own drive to create.; It is also not lost on my that my formal training in creativity is in the field of landscape design and as such I have an affinity for architects that not all artists share. Worked in architects' and landscape architects' offices for two years when I first came to NC.; February "drop one add two":; Dropped several magazine subscriptions, not so much that I didn't enjoy them (National Geographic, Outdoor Photographer, Sunshine Artist, Saturday News and Observer) as much as I have too much to read anyway and I don't need a regular dose of something from the outside distracting me from what might be coming up from my own resources.; Added a workable office space--new desk chair, better lighting, typing table that's at the right height and lets me hand-write and work at a keyboard without having to move my PC out of the way.; Added colored pencil to my journal entries. (This appears trivial even to me but I suspect it's going to turn out to have a profound impact on my ability to create 2D art. Inability to make 2D art is a major source of frustration to me today.) (Also, the colored pencil appeared on its own, rather than being something I "thought up." Practicing the art of listening to what shows up on its own.); Took a break from the saw over most of Dec and Jan and got back to it yesterday because I have orders for two bears that don't need to wait for additional Ridgway inspiration. My 16" bar is still out of commission and now I really need to get it into the shop. My Stihl 260 is great for blocking out but not for carving, as I discovered after two hours' work. Leaned around the bear to check the back of his ear and felt a "pop" on my left leg. Shouldn't be anything hitting me. Looked. Wow. That's why we wear chaps. 1" nick in Kevlar would have been an ambulance ride and a lot of stitches in denim and flesh, not to mention not carving for a MUCH longer time than it will take me to get new chaps. Glad I had my camera in my hip pocket and not in my chaps pocket! Three years, first moving chain-on-a-saw injury.; I am finding the idea of being an author of a real book infinitely more seductive than the actual work involved in getting from point A: the idea to point B: the finished product. Pricing printing--Ouch!! This is real up-front money! Endless spell and grammar checking. Even more reorganization; the more I write the more I can see how it can all fit together more effectively. Except that I'd really rather be: installing a new light assembling my new chair shopping for shelving for the bathroom walking the dog keeping up with email anything else on the planet and I have a month-end deadline and people will be more likely to buy if they have a finished product to look at. Wouldn't be surprised if some of the reason for the chainsaw cut was to send me back to my PC. Page count is dropping to something reasonable (perhaps 250 or so) as I print and read and realize there is a lot of duplication. Stay tuned. Another ice storm or two would be useful.
Feb 15, 2004 Sunday
Part One: Playing around with the question, "How can I grow my ideas?" yesterday led me to the etymology of Eidos via Ideas (although Eidos is actually "form") and from there to wanting to read the bit in the Bible, "in the beginning was the Word..." Hint: It's not Genesis, at least not in that phrasing (same idea). A friend with better Sunday School attendance than me said, "NT" and then I knew enough to know it had to be John and indeed, John 1:1, In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God.; OK, but Word = Logos, I know that. Read on.; John 1:3, All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made. (King James says it the most elegantly.); Wow. I was shaking by the time I was finished reading and I can still recreate the feeling a few days later. Suspect strongly that at the root of "things made" is Eidos, form, sculpture. Creation. Asked the Baptist Preacher who took one year of NT Greek 20 years ago and couldn't answer from his own information. Expect he will shop the problem because he would like to see me back in church and will encourage any Biblical interest I show. An excuse for a call, too.; I am allowing this verse to explain the emotional hit I get when I see some forms of creation, most specifically the major window in Mt. Olive Baptist's new church, which they didn't need to buy but makes the church, at night, the major architectural feature in this little town. And I am encouraged in my own stumbling way towards art, if I allow that it really does come from God. Reading ArtNews inclines me to think not all artists would explain their calling the same way.
Part Two: Em Yates, my neighbor to the south, died today. She was 95+ and had been in bad health since I moved in. The neighborhood shifts. Expect the house will be sold; a friend suggests I buy it. Think not; it's a money pit and a long way from code if I were to rent it out. I'm writing this entry after the funeral and viewing. I made an effort to be neighborly when I first moved in but pulled away the last two years, unable to handle her constant self-centered whining about her life. A life reviewed and closed in 20 minutes, 10 of which were about Jesus, and a pink-and-white coffin that was nicer than any of the furniture in her house. I hope to leave a different legacy, if nothing other than tangible work that shows I was here.
Feb 21, 2004 Saturday: Busy, very busy. Leave for Ridgway this coming Wednesday; running around making sure I have everything I need to travel. There's a Lowe's in the next town over and there will be a few saw vendors on the field but mostly, take it, borrow it, or do without. Randy is equipped--portable generator--so I'll be able to sand after burning. Have a general idea of what I want to carve but can't / don't want to draw it up in complete detail until I see my log.; Discovered Aidan Meehan's books on Celtic Design and bought 8; forcing myself to wait till they arrive before buying Sheila Sturrock's book, which looks differently accessible. Very strange feeling in my head to observe the switch between trying to draw a pattern by copying it and then learning how to construct it so that it almost draws itself. Just need the avenue in, which is true for most of the art I've done so far. Wish I could find it for painting.; Major transitions on my day job, not fully my choice but clearly doors closing, giving me an opportunity to stand it the dark hall and wait to see what comes next. Net, once I work the bruises out of my ego, is fewer conference calls, fewer distractions during the day, and a smaller circle of influence. Not sure yet if I am truly being called to make some kind of art that won't take form yet that shows up the pain in corporations or if that's a form of lingering resentment and I need to simply let it go and move on. Time will tell; if the feeling persists, I'll paint or sculpt or do something with whatever comes up. Fascinating to observe people telling me "you should change your personality; you should be more tactful and less outspoken," when I get no credit at all for NOT saying, "You should lose weight." It's the same thing.; Well. Got THAT out of my system, and feel a little scared just for putting out this much in public (enormous readership here, right?). Artists have to take those risks, right? (7/27/04 update: Ha! The people who displaced me into a new position have themselves been displaced by a recent reorganization. What goes around...); (I also said, "No one told Jesus that he should have toned it down when he was clearing the Temple." My manager acknowledged I had a point but it only goes so far; this is not the Temple and in any case, the money changes own the joint and write the checks.); Book continues to make progress; have support from the major contributors. Will have several draft copies for pre-sale at the Rendezvous; hope to be in print by April. VERY hard work coming down to the first-draft finish line and working to a deadline. Microsoft is throwing up its own formatting obstacles. PITT.; My Architect opened in town last night; took an artistically-inclined girlfriend and we both loved it. The life of Louis Kahn, architect, as uncovered by his son. If it stays around I may go see it again and will certainly buy the DVD as soon as it is available. Wonderful to listen to a movie full of professionally creative people talking about their own and Louis' approach to being creative and what it's like to live with creative people. Tried to take notes in the dark and didn't catch half of what I wanted to.; Recent seductions: reviewing books about book binding because I can't find a bound journal that works for the current outpouring. Gone to 11x17 loose paper and that will work for at least the ream I bought, but at current rate I'll be done inside 60 days (single sided now). Thinking on 18x24 folded signature stitched or am I just being nuts? maybe the writing binge will pass in a while and I'll be back to 3 or 4 8x11 pages? My handwriting got a little bigger and the inter-line spacing improved, as did left margin, with the move to the bigger format. I do kinda big art. Accept it. Keep meandering through the sketchbook and loose paper sections of art and office supply stores and haven't found the right solution yet.; Orbiting the Giant Hairball arrived the same day I was told about my new assignment on my day job. Ironic. Wasn't sure it'd be worth the money to be because it's about being creative in a corporate environment, at least on the briefest of first passes, but it certainly was consolation and I think it will be as inspiring as anything else on the shelf above my desk, which is full of Tufte, Art & Fear, Editing by Design, Laurel Burch, James Christiansen, a thesaurus and dictionary, et al. Might be time to shift some of them around, too.
Sunday, March 7, 2004: Post Ridgway. Put the book to bed. How can there still be this many edits, and that's not counting additions to the index? I want to get a Ridgway page together for this website and haven't found the clear space to do it. Need to start carving for existing commissions and Spring shows. Weather is nice now--daffodils in early-full bloom, both magnolias (stellata and soulangiana) in bloom.; Looked into having a sawmill cut the block for more obelisks. Rip cutting is not my cup of tea. $100 for a blank, 12" square at the base, 8' tall. May have to try rip cutting my own blank one more time. (*** to April 28)
Sunday, March 28, 2004: Book won't go to sleep. Edits about done; compiling the permissions list, the excerpt, the author's photo, bio, "final" proofing, index. The end is in sight but not here yet.; Took a day off last Sunday to catch the Jon Kuhn exhibit at the Mint Museum of Craft + Design in Charlotte. I'd been wanting to go; other things got in the way. Still mad I missed the Linda MacNeil show and didn't want a repeat of that. Made the last two hours of Kuhn--Charlotte's farther away than I plan on. Knew immediately on walking in to the gallery why I had to be there: progression and evolution in art. The show had pieces from the beginning of his career--fused and slumped glass; cut-aways, acid washed. Then the beginnings of the assembly and polishing, using colored glass getting more transparent over time until the current work, endless refraction and sparkle and spectra.; What I took away was that in 1996, Jon didn't know what his sculptures would look like in 2003 and he was doing everything he could at the time. If he'd know where he was going, he would have been doing it already. I can see a very few pieces into my own artistic future. There's this current book, maybe others from chatlists, maybe non-fiction on art, maybe a novel?!? Can't see that step yet; just know I have to produce the one in front of me and I'm learning something. Then there's the knotwork. Getting better at drawing it; just ordered a beam cutter so I'll be better able to make straight rip cuts and cut my own obelisks. The assembly pattern for a complete Celtic cross with the circle came to me while walking the dog the other day. Maybe I've passed penguins and they were simply the entry point like Kuhn's "paperweights" were for him.; (Interesting--I can be simultaneously awed by his mastery of an art form I wish I could do but can't envision running a studio with 27 employees making sculptures that sell for six figures, AND aware there's more development in store--can Jon create curves? Everything's angular, and in some cases, curves would be better. Feel like I did when I left Cirque du Soleil last year and knew that some of those performers would think I was outre for being a chainsaw carver.); Meanwhile, Mick Burns sent pictures of the last four Sculptree / Festival of the Wood shows; carvers in the United Kingdom working for a week on Big Wood. I want to be outside carving, not inside editing and balancing checkbooks. Have to work to accept that these carvings are a week of full-time effort, not an hour on a Saturday afternoon in between mailbox bears and mushrooms. Nevertheless, I'm inspired in a way Ridgway didn't move me. Different imagination in the Sculptree carvings--Mick's fungi fits right in rather than being an anomaly as it was at the 'Vous. So many carving ideas so little daylight.; However, I am carving again, after too long away. Cleaned up some old obligations Saturday afternoon--a bunny for the lady in Siler, a Backus bear promised at Thanksgiving, mushrooms for Mom. Off to harvest a big (for the East Coast) cedar trunk from Haywood this morning. Timed so I can run a chainsaw at 10 AM on a Sunday morning! Can't do that in my own backyard.; Have to laugh. The first thing I did this morning after turning on the coffee pot was take the air filter out of my Echo and put it to soak. Should have done it last night; forgot. Nothing like coffee and gasoline to start the day. I now recognize the problem right away--remember when a dirty air filter was something that stopped me for a while.
April 28, 2004: Look at this: Show week, and I'm relaxed enough to be writing for the website. Life is good. The book went to the printer on April 9 then it was tax time and since then, I've been carving just about every waking non-church moment, getting work ready for the Sanford Pottery Festival this weekend. I'll be taking 15 pieces which is the number that's filled the booth before. Had hoped to have more but I sold five pieces earlier this month (plus one donation for the Raulston Arboretum). This is a high-class problem.; Working on the price list for Saturday. I have my anticipated prices; want to validate them against my hours and weight model. Some people in the book are adamant that pricing by the pound is ridiculous, but it's pretty good for keeping my prices linear when I get lost on how much effort a carving took. The collector doesn't care about that. So tomorrow morning, I'll be outside with the scale to see whether I estimated accurately.; New finish, new carving. Colored oil stains can go on a 40-grit sanded finish; paint requires at least a 100-grit finish and would really prefer 400-grit. Less time doing the part I hate. I love carving the Celtic knot work and so far, the public likes buying it. I've had a lot of interest in the "doodle" offcut that I took to Shakori Hills; I think the more recent work is better and we'll see this weekend.; *** Bought a beam cutter to help with the rip cuts; 11 cuts later I have 8 straight sides. However, if the offcuts continue to sell and I get 5 salable carvings from a log and not simply the obelisk in the middle, paying a mill to rip the log becomes a much better option. The beam cutter only helps with cutting a straight line; it doesn't make the cutting itself go any faster. Lots of time to meditate while you watch the saw move through the wood. LOTS of time.; Carving pressure doesn't stop after this weekend; there are more places to show this year than last so I'll be working all summer. This is good. I might even sell all summer, which would be even better. Realize now I haven't written about being accepted to the Chatham Studio Tour this year. I was, so I'll be carving all through the fall, too. Looking forward to the Tour; because people come to the studio and expect to find real art, I can carve much bigger pieces than I could haul to a craft show and display in a 10x10 booth. Look for a Celtic cross, once I get a bit more comfortable with the knot work on obelisks.; I'm taking a short course on Celtic Spirituality at Chapel of the Cross (Episcopal) in Chapel Hill. I want to learn a little more about what the people who invented this art form were thinking. Not getting much in the way of answers from the class itself but it has directed me to more resources than I was aware of. It would appear that the Celts got away with what I call "original Christianity" for about 300 years more than the rest of Europe did, after Nicea and whichever other councils kicked the Gnostics into history. And now mainline Christians are going on pilgrimages and studying the Celtic saints and wondering what it was that the Celts had that people find missing in today's church. I suspect I have an answer but this class isn't ready to hear it.; Funnily enough, a neighbor asked me to display some of my art at the Baptist Church on Sunday. They're studying The Purpose-Driven Life (which I haven't read) and it talks about alternative forms of worship and one can worship through art and this neighbor thought of me. It would be a better display it if weren't on the same weekend as the Pottery Festival. I'll write up something from my Feb 15 entry above. Wonder how it will play?; Reading books about how to sell books; still waiting on my Aidan Meehan order from the English bookseller who is very good at telling shipping stories and not as good at shipping; just bought all of Leonard Shlain's books on the strength and impact of the Alphabet vs the Goddess--a study of how literacy and the alphabet have affected human society throughout history (precis--initially, it gets bad for women and all right brain activity). Given me a lot to think about. Revelation: the Capability Maturity Model, the core document of my day job's focus, could well be one of the ultimate examples of left-brain triumph. No wonder I'm coming to hate it. However, nothing that unbalanced lasts forever. Maybe I'll illustrate the book... pictures bring you back to the right brain. Carve the CMM... Nobody would get it. (See Wordsworth's poem below at the end of the May 9 entry.)
May 9, 2004 Sunday: First schedule break since the idea of doing a book first showed up in January--book, taxes, then Sanford Pottery Festival. Showing opportunities in June that need more finished work than I have on hand, but they're more flexible and don't have hard cash booth fee outlays. Working on commissions--a mailbox bear for an 8" post, a standing bear in trade for the logs that have become the Celtic obelisks, a bunny. Nieces' birthdays coming up and they may all get mushroom stools. Lots of carving-for-fun ideas stacked up; I want to try a chain and caught myself in time. Start with a 3' log and a 3- or 4-link chain before I try one of the big logs in the far backyard that will make a 12-link chain.; Started ripping another obelisk; will probably do this one in colors. At the SPF04, some people said Forever Flowerbox was "too bright." I think it's pretty muted, especially considering my other work. So it will be a useful test to see whether a colored obelisk outsells a plain burned-and-sealed one. Rip went off in a direction of its own when the guiding 2x4 twisted so the offcut is quite a bit bigger than I'd planned; big enough for a Tree of Life. Look for an example in George Bain's Celtic Art.; Started proofing the Carve Smart pdf, aiming at 10 pages a day. Already found one glaring error (witch for which?!?) so there will be more. The publisher says most people take two weeks to proof the book; I'm hoping to spread the reading out so that I don't have to abandon carving when the book does come back for review. Plus, I can only pay attention to a limited number of pages a day, and I need to be reading it as closely as possible this time. Wonder what else slipped past two editors?; The garden finally got long-overdue attention this week. If we ever do have another local Tour de Moncure in early May, the garden will be fabulous. Iris, peonies, baptisia. Not quite as flashy as it looks in June or March, with 2000+ daffodils, but clearly a garden.; Plan on spending the rest of church-time updating the rest of this site. Little of the most recent work is on here; I'm looking into getting a booth at some of the Celtic festivals this summer and you wouldn't know I've ever carved anything but penguins if you look here. Need to do a website for the book, too--I have the domain and the host but not the HTML, except for what's already posted here. Trying to spread out the desk work because I can't stand to be inside during daylight this time of year, and I don't seem to be very good at computer work after I've been outside most of the day. Church time is useful, if I will take advantage of it. (As mentioned elsewhere--one of the churches is black Baptist; that means "quiet time" till at least 1:30 on a Sunday.); Artistic process question du jour: planning vs. spontaneity, impulse vs. strategy. How is it that I can pull off a book, get my taxes done on time, and show up at the SPF04 with a booth full of work, and yet when I sit down with a May calendar and try to determine when I can do some of the current projects on my list, my mind goes blank? And they will probably get done, too--in the back of my mind, I know what I want to be different by the 4th annual Penguin Party; I know how much work I need for the September shows and then the Studio Tour in December. But it won't go on a calendar.; But then: I found this fragment from Wordsworth's Prelude in a book last night:

The Guides, the Wardens of our faculties, and Stewards of our labour, watchful men

And skilful in the usury of time,

Sages, who in their prescience would controul

All accidents, and to the very road

Which they have fashion'd would define us down

Like engines.

1. Sounds like the project management subject matter experts in a CMM-I audit. (Day-job joke. Carving Kekule's Dream was equally obscure in Sanford, but people got the joke in Durham. Wonder if anyone reading this will see the connection?); 2. Wonder if I'd be more able to schedule my artistic production if I didn't do scheduling and project management for my day-job?; Stay tuned.
Tuesday, May 11.: One of the library branches is moving in June so they are letting everyone check out an unlimited number of books in May, to be returned to the new location by the middle of July. They say you can take up to 100 books, but the librarian said they'd waive the limit if you wanted to carry more away. Unlimited books and eight weeks to read. It's like Barnes & Noble having a $1-a-bag sale! They gave me a cart to walk around the stacks with, and boxes to bring everything home--I have 75 books checked out right now.; Unfortunately, the policy only applies to books from that branch, and the shelves are getting a little empty. No Elaine Pagels, no Wordsworth, a few others missing for the duration. Like I'm going to read all of 75 books (plus a recent record week at abe.com) in eight weeks, while proofing my own book, while carving, while watching movies as fast as I can?? I want to go back tonight for more.; Then again, remember the summer I discovered John MacDonald? You can (I can, at least) read a lot of books when you find a new author you like. I brought every Carroll O'Connell they had home. It is an amazing feeling to walk up and down the stacks of a library and take out EVERY book that catches one's eye and know at the same time you are doing a good thing for the library. Strange blend of greed and satiation and curiosity unfurled, a bit of hoarding and reclusiveness tossed in the mix. Massive "Input" (See Now Discover Your Strengths.) One box of picture books for art idea-feeding, one box of non-fiction with a few novels for fun and post-carving, no-movie exhaustion. My hammock is waiting.; At the very same time: the eharmony.com profile asks you to talk about the last book you read. I can barely comprehend the question in real time. They ask as if this is a static answer, one that might not change from week to week, perhaps, let alone from hour to hour? How often should I be updating this profile in the light of my recent haul? Of course, I don't need to take the question literally; there are hundreds of books I could mention that would be "important" enough to represent me to potential partners. OTOH, I am so tempted--what about Laura Kipnis' Against Love: a Polemic? Gagnon et. al., and Sex in America? Simon Blackburn's Lust (except I couldn't follow a lot of it and am still not sure that he fully defined when it's lust, love, greed, or something else)? Probably will go with Leonard Shlain's The Alphabet vs. the Goddess; that's good enough email introduction or a first date material. If they can't follow, we're not going to make it anyway.; March 25, 2006 update to "latest book read:" I used the Alphabet vs the Goddess, until I read Sex, Time and Power, also by L. Shlain, and then I discovered that using the word "sex" in an on-line dating profile massively increased the # of views my profile received. In the match.com box for "latest book read," I said, "Sex, Time and Power, by Leonard Shlain. This is very disappointing to men who found this profile by searching on the word "sex."
Sunday, June 6.: Post-bronchitis, post-installing three concurrent shows, post-Moore County Arts Council Tour de Moncure show opening, the first with my name on the postcard (along with nine other artists). Busy weekend and it's still only Sunday morning!; 1. Acknowledge that this is the first time I've been able to stock three concurrent shows--Willow Walk in Burlington, Moore County in Southern Pines, and the Holly Hill Daylily Festival just down the road a mile in Haywood. Took Cub in a Stump over to Holly Hill last night--I'd overlooked him when I loaded up on Friday--and he sold within five minutes. Carve another!!; 2. Much fun to be on the Artist side of the opening. Hang out with the sculptors, be accepted as a professional. Getting increasingly comfortable with this idea.; 3. After-party at Jason Arkles' studio. Wow. Why do I bother with a living room? You walk into his modeling space; tiny bedroom off to one side, kitchen on the other, that's it. No ground for the suburban accoutrements, and I think it matters that I have a dining room, even if I've only eaten there about three times in the years I've lived in the house. It's all but official studio space as it is, currently full of paint as I decide what I'm doing with the kitchen floor. Jason keeps a workshop in the back, and a marble studio beyond that. Lots of technical assistance for duplicating and enlarging sculptures from his maquette. Lyle, Kevin and I are a bit taken aback--we're not making identical copies and enlargements just happen, not according to exact measurements. But then we're not doing realism, either.; Massive debate in my head this morning about what is art, what is my art, where do I fit. Am I wasting time to carve the doors in my house and paint Celtic patterns on the kitchen floor; what's the point of the new screen door on the kitchen deck? Traces of suburbia that I should abandon? Or filling my life with art to encourage me to make more? So Jason's carving allegories and I'm copying patterns from the Book of Kells and where's the creativity in that? (Except that no other c-s carver in the US is doing anything like what I'm doing, and it'd be better to do bears?); No answer today except to observe that I've missed out on some opportunities recently for lack of preparedness, and the only way to avoid that in the future is to be as ready as I can be. I'm learning my way around the knotwork and I don't know why it matters. Yet. But looking at what I've learned about carving knotwork shows that it's not theoretical--anyone can get the patterns out of the book but that's what I carved at Ridgway and I'm way better than that already.; 4. Got a call from the Carve Smart publisher about the cover; indicated I would see the proof copies this past week but nothing came in the mail yet. I've read the *.pdf and made some of the corrections on my own file copy; hoping this will speed turn-around time for the final print run. Called most of the buyers and told them to expect the hard copy in July, not May as originally expected. I forget how much work I've already put into this project. Not sure if I'll do volume 2 or not. Just got a cable modem connection so downloading will not be the excruciating process it was over dial-up.
Tuesday, July 27: Topsail Island with my parents and niece, post pre-order shipping for Carve Smart, pre-fall show rush of carving. Events: Carve Smart publication; iron pour at the Moncure Museum of Art; started painting.; 1. Proof copies of Carve Smart arrived; thank goodness I had already proofed the text because I found it almost impossible to actually look at the book. Forced myself to turn every page and found a few additional corrections; adjusted the contributors list; changed the cover. Very scary to see the manuscript in "real-book" form, and did not expect this to happen. Finally forced the proof back to the publisher over 4th of July weekend and then sent two copies to the Library of Congress for copyright registration.; Ordered 80 copies to start; have sold 44 pre-publication. Ordered boxes; didn't think about tape and had just enough. Books arrived and then I had to throw the website together in a hurry. Nothing like a deadline to inspire; I've had "build CarveSmart.com" on my to-do list for six weeks.; Understand shipping-and-handling charges differently now that I've wrapped, packed, and mailed 44 copies of the book. The post office is glad to get the business! Posted an announcement on the carvingpost.com forum and initial response was limited but positive. Start serious marketing to other chainsaw communities when I get back from the beach--have publication lists for forestry and lumber industries. I think I've had enough with this model and at the moment, at least, do NOT plan on compiling Carve Smarter, volume II.; 2. Too many days of not being able to carve because I'm hurting, because the church is in session, because it's too late in the day when I get clear of other work. Too hard to get as much color on a sculpture as I want. Too many ideas that aren't easily carvable. Need art for the wall above my bed. Who knows what makes a painter paint? Bought a canvas that fits the space and started working on a spiral knot idea I've struggled to draw. The first version left me pretty cold, so I gessoed over it and started again. I can see how the next painting will be better, but I will probably at least finish and hang Spiral II. It is nice to be able to make art and not be in serious ache at the end of the session.; 3. Metal sculptor neighbors had an iron pour Saturday night. "Moncure: Community of Artists" means we have personal smelters. (For the record, another neighbor has a personal oil refinery that makes diesel fuel, and my studio could be described as a personal lumberyard.) I arrived when the furnace was being pre-heated; it took several hours to get it hot enough. In the meantime, people were busting old cast-iron radiators into small parts to serve as the raw material. The ladle was preheated. Finally, it was time to melt. The furnace was filled with burning coke. Several pounds of iron scrap were poured in the top, then a grocery-bag load of additional coke. This pattern was repeated once or twice for each pour.; The smelter had a tap on the back to let the slag out, and the pure iron flowed further down to the bottom of the smelter. It takes 5 or 6 people to tap for a pour--two on the ladle, one to tap, one to replug when the ladle was full, one to swab slag off the top of the ladle. Two others were feeding the smelter and managing the slag hole. Molten iron was poured into the waiting molds; an acid test of preparation. Some leaked; some weren't sufficiently braced level for the additional weight of the iron. The wax caught fire as it was forced out of the mold. Spilled iron flamed on the grass and was quenched by a shovel of sand.; This is stale writing and I can't being to describe how powerful the experience was in fact. My writing skill isn't up to it, and even it if was, listening to my niece's cartoons in the background isn't helping.; There's nothing like watching molten iron pour out of a furnace, after dark, sparks flying as the furnace is recharged, watching grocery bags instantly vaporize in the heat of the smelter. I've seen gold smelted from ore industrially, and it's similar in power but sterile. Casting teams in full leather gear with face shields to protect them from the heat. The smell of hot metal and burning coke. I've never cared about the history of man through metals (quick: when did the Bronze Age end? What's the difference between the different metals as evidenced in metallurgic technology and military power?). Now I need to learn, and I'll retain the information in a way I never did in World History. (OTOH, I can't imagine chaperoning a class of high school sophomores around molten metal.); A point: Any iron worker from the height of the Iron Age could have stepped into the production on Saturday night. Assume for the moment he could have accepted the three changes--electricity powering the blower instead of bellows; acetylene running into the furnace and keeping the ladle hot between pours, and as I think would be different, the presence of woman a) at the pour at all, and b) actively participating. Apart from that, he would have known exactly what to do at each stage of the operation. Do I do anything that hasn't changed since the Iron Age?; If nothing else, the pour is proof of my theory that one of the elements that distinguishes sculptors from painters is danger. Sculptors in almost all media face death or immediate serious bodily injury in the creation of their art in a way that painters never will. A few people were drinking a few beers while the smelter was heated but no-one messes with molten metal at 3800 degrees while inebriated. The same is true for chainsaw sculptors, BTW. Even though many drink after a day's work, you can't drink and run a chainsaw the way you can drink and paint. Life intervenes, so to speak.; Jason Arkles suggests sculptors are, as a group, tend to be loners and are less sociable than painters. We only get together under duress--because casting demands a team of people; when we have to move stone that's too heavy for one person to tackle. Another element may be in the 3D nature of our work, perhaps more firmly and deeply driven by the right brain than flat art. Painters get all the words and the books. There's not much in the market for sculptors. Another element that crosses my mind this morning is the proximity of sculpture to craft--utilitarian things are 3D; paintings are almost universally "useless," in a coldly pragmatic sense. I don't know. I would like to ask Leonard Shlain but even he hasn't given much ink to sculptors other than Giacometti and Moore. Wonder if Edward Tufte has considered the problem?; Off to explore a bit--rumors of a carver working nearby but no-one has contact information. Plan to drive up the beach a bit and see if I can find him.